Monday, November 3, 2008

what should a girl do???

--any comment by those of the opposite sex will be deleted ( sorry tyro , tera bhi kar dungi , bura mat maniyo guys log) .

Ya & now I''ll get on with the post & please before getting me wrong , do read the whole post.

I am(or was until i realised) petrified of dressing up , wearing kajal etc etc In fact I used to make fun of girls who used to do that , I used to call them 'delicate darlings' , 'dimpy darlings' , 'simpering queens' & what not . I had this notion that if i ever wore any sort of make up or even earrings , people would percieve me as a ''lallu'' or some ''beauty without brains'' . Infact I was afraid that someone else might call me by the same names that I had given to the many girls I had given . I thought the guys ( yes you read that right ) would not treat me as an equal if I ever let go of these notions , scary dreams of not getting a job & being treated lightly by people haunted me.

I have read some blogs , newspaper articles, magazines , which show women boasting of doing liposuctions, plastic surgeries to look beautiful . One simple thing could never penetrate my hard skull was why all these women were spending so much on beauty. I mean everything will fade away in its own sweet time won't it?? . Somewhere down the line realised that all these were done to attract men. How repulsed I felt by the very thought , never failing to criticise such people .

Behaving like a girl/ woman would in this world could earn her usual comments like " ohh so girlyyy" , " typically girlyy" , "who's she trying to baby?" .Behaving like a girl could be a greater sin than dressing like one. you can't complain about people smoking ( irrespective of their gender) *Oh she's too soft* , or abusive language , funny na , how almost all the awful-est abuses are aimed at the female .

Some years later , I realised a sort of funny thing , even though i had modified myself to neve be girly , i too had changed for the male mindset. How silly * there is no need to change ourselves for anyone else* that was what i had thought forever & yet i had.

The world around us is strewn with women , women we love , women with integrity , women with strength. Some of my personal favourites are -- Mother Teresa,Indira Gandhi , Julia Roberts & apni Priety Z.

I still cringe when I hear things like "a child out of wedlock is no- no"* how can any child be not good??*, "OMG you are still single ?? hopefully , you won't go down the wrong way" *No , I won't !!!!* , "Gosh , I can't wait to fall in love"*& then madly falling for someone who gave you a rose & said something like -- i see the moon in your eyes , & then breaking up with that one in about 3 years"

I just felt like writing it all down . Some of you might find me confused about this topic , maybe thats because deep inside I'm a feminist to the T & at the same time have also realised that changing your viewpoint keeping the male thinking in mind would be just like killing thy true self.

ps-- & all those guys who have already read it ,don't comment on this topic.


Keshi said...

Superb post girl! I simply loved it. U said it the best and so spot on too!

**there is no need to change ourselves for anyone else

Thats all there is to it.

Outer beauty instantly becomes nothing if there's no INNER beauty. For example if u talk to a beautiful girl and suddenly find out she's no more than an empty-head who knows nothing abt the world or life or hv no character, then that outer beauty is of no use.

The real attraction lies WITHIN. And all those women u mentioned are truly beautiful! And Indira Gandhi is one of my favs too.



Think Tank said...

oh good ..that was me a few yrs back ..n i decided to give the guys a kick ..who cares about their viewpoint neway im a girlly girly ..airy fairy girl ..n nobody dare call me beaauty widout brains..tho that may b becoz im no buty? kya? n indra gandi she was voted the best dressed woman in d world ...SHE was very look conscious ..dint make her soft..

Tara said...

Nice topic! And a really well written post too! It's something I am, you know the intellectual, brainy types....tending to nerd-ish!! The khadi kurta-patiala salwar-osho chappal girl...that's me! Even I thought, all this dressing up, make up at al is for the "bimbettes"! May be not, even people who dress well and look good can talk sense!

I had this girl in school, who would everyday have the best hair, the clearest complexion...blah blah...the typical doll. But when I spoke to her, she was intelligent, smart...she dressed up because she wanted to feel good! It's all about how you take it I guess..and don't bother of the'll get adjusted soon!

And as they say, beauty lies in the eyes of the beholder! Anyone can find anyone beautiful! Completely agree with Keshi here, it's all about inner beauty in the end! :)

Priya Joyce said...

I will completely agree to u...
i guess only superficial women spend so much on beauty..They don't hav nything effective to do tats it...

Mads said...

wow..i feel like i wrote this post...
i used to taunt all those girly delicate darlings for doing all this crap, and now, when im 19. im having a hard time, being single and well, not knowing how to put kajal etc. etc. (im like, wtf is the difference between an eye liner and eye shadow)

cheers...we gotta do it..coz we're worth it :P

lovely post, gal... :-)

vanilla sky said...

The bottomline is , whatever you do , do it with full consent from your heart...and not to appease anybody else's wish.
but likewise, if somebody is happy dressing up , that shudn't be considered a fragile act andgoing around in unironed clothes are not one's entry ticket for stronger lines

okay, i wrote a too confused comment :(

I'll try 2 be truthful said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
I'll try 2 be truthful said...

:) sad that very few people recognise inner beauty , most of 'em run after the outer one

@think tank
i liked her strict n crisp style of dressing .& if anyone calls u beauty without brains give them a tight slap from my side too.

we are the same type then , u know even after realising this i feel silly if i put makeup.

I'll try 2 be truthful said...

@priya joice
aur nahi to kya?

hey guess wat ?? am 21 & single too . u know maybe sometimes u"ll feel sad wen u see other so called 'committed people" but then u"ll realise how free u are.

e ami kobe unpressed kapod porechi?? acha acha got your point :)

joie de vivre said...

dat was now very intrestin to read..

I'll try 2 be truthful said...

:)yaar main to ajkal interesting banti jaa rahi hu :P

Anonymous said...

na na, i was n't referring to you in wildest dreams

it was a very confused comment :(

kiran sawhney said...

fantastic post for GIRLS.

Anonymous said...

Beauty is only skin deep wheather you are a girly girl or a tom boy, its not the looks that matter its having the interlect, the confidence and the pride in knowing that you are a woman and no inferior to any man thats important.
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